Click bait

Is the purpose of a late night talk to get ratings or merely to serve as click bait? Is the real objective now the number of online viewings for various segments? Get enough eyeballs and you can sponsor the clips.

Les Moonves of CBS, at a recent session at the Bank of America Merrill Lynch Media, Communications & Entertainment Conference, called online clip viewing a “great secondary source of revenue.”

He also acknowledged that Letterman wasn’t into that. I’m guessing that’s one of the reasons Dave was pushed out the door. (And I’m sorry, no matter what he or anyone publicly says, I believe Dave was “asked” to leave for a younger host.) In discussing Colbert’s appeal versus Letterman's, Moonves said: “It’s a younger demographic and a hipper demographic. So Colbert could be a significant profit center.”

Profit center, source of income. Yeah, Dave, don't let the door hit you on the way out. 

I have no problem with late night clips being available online. I watch them too. But I worry, will the programming of these late night shows change in order to maximize click bait? There used to be a flow to these nocturnal programs, there used to be a rhythm. I suspect one reason Dave was less excited about carving up his segments for online bite-sized viewing was that he often had running jokes through his show. Those callbacks would mean nothing if taken out of context.

Continuity used to be a big part of these shows. “Remember last night when we…?” Well, continuity is gone when viewers can watch clips from any day.

Now segments need to be flashy. Now each one needs a hook. NBC getting Fallon was a brilliant stroke if click bait is the goal. Playing games with celebrities, singing with them, karaoke – perfect programming for attracting online viewers.

Will Stephen and the other Jimmy be pushed to do more of that themselves? Will monologues give way because they don’t draw as many clicks? Will guests be selected based on their internet popularity? Will late night shows become the networks’ version of Monty Python’s “Now For Something Completely Different?”

My fear is that a little of the spontaneity and unpredictable nature of late night talk shows will give way to pre-packaged bits and promotable segments. I worry that the producers will forget that first and foremost they’re making a TELEVISION show. There are times I almost yell at the screen, “Hey, instead of programming for people who aren’t watching, how about programming for the people like me who ARE?” It’s kind of disconcerting to realize then networks don’t want me even when I am watching.

And warning: The major broadcast networks have a big edge on the late night audience because they deliver the most affiliates and are the big guns. But if click bait is the goal then it’s a level playing field. Conan on TBS can out click you. Or anyone who comes along on any network.  Roseanne are you listening?  Come back! 

Happy Birthday to my hero

If you’ll indulge me, I’m going to devote today’s post to wishing my father, Cliff the happiest of birthdays. Since he’s not on Facebook he won’t receive the flood of birthday greetings that everyone receives so he’ll have to make do celebrating old school – reading a blog post.

Dad turns 88 today. Happy to say he’s as sharp and feisty as ever. He lives in a retirement community and tells the women residents he’s a pornography director looking for new talent. He’ll excuse himself from breakfast saying he has to speak at the UN later. He’ll challenge residents in walkers to a race.

Gee, where do I get my sense of humor?

He once started a whipped cream fight at the dinner table when I was a kid. As a teenager, he took me to see Jack Benny, Bob Newhart, and Danny Thomas perform in Las Vegas. He introduced me to Laurel & Hardy, Jackie Gleason & Art Carney, Bilko, Looney Tunes, and the Three Stooges. He told me there was this new TV show he thought I’d like. It was THE DICK VAN DYKE SHOW.

He worked as a radio executive for many years, first as the sales manager of KABC in Los Angeles and eventually the General Manager of 50,000 watt WLS in Chicago. John Records Landecker, on his last show a few weeks ago acknowledged my father.

But more than that, my dad is my hero. For all his many accomplishments, I am proudest of how highly regarded he is by all who have worked with him and all who know him. He treats everyone with respect and conducts business with grace and integrity. Could a kid have a better role model?

So Happy Birthday, Dad. I love you. And I think a whipped cream fight in the main dining room is long overdue. Just sayin’.

The 20th Century lot... back in the 20th Century

One of the many perks of writing MASH in the late ‘70s was going to work every day at the 20th Century Fox lot. At that time it was Disneyland for TV geeks.

We worked in the Old Writers Building, which was a Swiss chalet. I was told our office was once F. Scott’s Fitzgerald’s. There were some empty gin bottles behind the couch so that's probably true.

We parked in the western town used in BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID. We drove onto the lot past the New York street from HELLO DOLLY. Near the commissary was the famous gazebo from TV’s PEYTON PLACE (okay, you have to be a certain age to give a shit about that one.).

There was still a foot bridge over Olympic Blvd. and a backlot. David and I would walk through the backlot on the way to lunch at Century City. There we’d see STAR WARS sets just collecting dust.

We used to watch dailies in a screening room that was behind the facade for the Gotham police department from the TV BATMAN.

Mel Brooks made his movies at 20th which usually meant extras walking around in Nazi uniforms.

CHARLIE’S ANGELS was filmed on the lot and you’d bump into one of those girls at least once a week. Even more if you hung around their trailers.

For some reason Evil Knieval, the daredevil who would try to ride motorcycles over the Grand Canyon and spent most of his life in hospitals, had a production deal and was always around.

But the best other show that filmed on the lot was THE LOVE BOAT. First off, there were always gorgeous 6’ 9’’ showgirls wandering all over the lot. But that was nothing.

Every sitcom star and second banana from that era and prior eras guested on THE LOVE BOAT. And we would see them all the time at the commissary. It was liking going to the world’s greatest nostalgia show every day except the celebrities still looked recognizable and you weren’t charged $20 to get in.

Among the “stars” I got to see up close and personal were: Carol Channing (Hello Dolly), Connie Stevens (Hello Cricket), Erin Moran (Hello Joanie), Charo (although I saw her just two weeks ago on the Paramount lot), Arte Johnson, Ethel Merman, Dick Van Patton, Ted Knight, Betty White (she’s been in everything), Nancy Kulp, Florence Henderson & Robert Reed (Tom isn't the only Brady), Alexis Smith, Don Adams, Elaine Joyce (pre J.D. Salinger and Neil Simon), Phyllis Diller, Lyle Waggoner, Cesar Romero, and if you can believe it – Jimmy Osmond. And that’s just scratching the guest star surface. For me it was awesome – my childhood flashing before my eyes, all these icons of my youth eating Chinese chicken salads.

And then there are the ghosts of years gone by that you know walked the same streets, although when I saw Ethel Merman I wasn’t sure if she was real or one of those ghosts.

Being on a major Hollywood studio lot was a real privilege in those days. Today, to save money, lots of shows are filmed in rented warehouses in Valencia or the City of Industry. Gone is the mystique when you have to drive halfway to Bakersfield to get to your soundstage.

Hollywood really was a magic town at one time. But that was when filmmakers and showmen were in charge, not CEO’s and mega-conglomerates. There won’t be many ghosts in Valencia (especially in the summer when it get sooooo damn hot).

My favorite scripts

Here’s one of those Friday Questions that became an entire post. Once I start writing about myself things naturally just get lengthy.

David (not Isaacs) asks:

What do you feel is the best stuff you've ever written or been apart of? Produced or otherwise. What are you proudest of? What would you consider to be the essential viewing for a fan of Ken Levine & David Isaacs?

Were someone to stage a Levine & Isaacs film festival (like that’s ever going to happen), here are the episodes I would have them show (in no particular order or ranking):

MASH – “Point of View” – An entire episode shown through the eyes of a patient. Clearly our most unique work. But I can’t mention it without acknowledging the extraordinary job that director Charles Dubin did. We visualized it; he realized it. Nominated for several Emmys. Sorry we didn’t win but still furious that Charles didn’t win.

MASH – “Out of Sight/Out of Mind” – Our first MASH and the script that really launched our career. The speech that Hawkeye delivers explaining what it’s like to be blind was word-for-word from our first draft. It’s the best single speech we’ve ever written.

MASH – “Goodbye Radar, Part 2” – Our swan song was Radar’s as well. I think what made this episode so powerful was that we didn’t give anybody a big speech. The tag still chokes me up. Nominated for an Emmy.

THE TONY RANDALL SHOW – “The People Speak” – Most of you are saying “What’s the Tony Randall Show?” This was an MTM series produced by the same people who did THE BOB NEWHART SHOW. Tony Randall played a judge. In this episode he runs for superior court justice and loses to a dead man. There are some big laughs in it.

CHEERS – “Boys in the Bar” – From season one. Sam defends his old roommate who came out of the closet and the regulars worry that the bar will go gay. Sensitive subject matter for 1982 but it came out great. We received the WGA and GLAAD award and were nominated for an Emmy.

CHEERS – “To All the Girls I’ve Loved Before” – Frasier’s bachelor party. What I love so much about this episode is that we broke from tradition and wrote it without any outline. Strictly free form. We wanted to create the feel of a real bar experience where conversations were varied and fragmented. The only “story” we had going in was that Frasier would question whether he wanted to go through with the wedding and decides by the end that he does. Wasn’t nominated for anything.

CHEERS – “The Big Kiss-Off” – There’s nothing socially redeeming about this one at all. It was just really funny. Sam and Woody make a bet to see who can kiss Rebecca first.  Just silly fun.  Not even considered for a Peabody. 

CHEERS – “Rat Girl” – Lilith keeps a dead rat in her purse. We won the WGA award for this one, beating out a SEINFELD episode. Every time I see Larry David to this day he grouses about it.

CHEERS – “Death Takes a Holiday on Ice” – Eddie LeBec is killed by a Zamboni machine and Carla learns her late husband was a bigamist. Nominated for an Emmy (and told by members of the blue ribbon committee that we had won, but we didn’t).

FRASIER – “The Show Where Lilith Comes Back” – First season, first appearance by Lilith. Lost another Emmy but in this case we were just happy to be nominated. The FRASIER pilot won, as it should have.

FRASIER – “Adventures in Paradise Part 2” – Might be our single funniest episode ever. Frasier faking an orgasm still kills me.

FRASIER – “Room Service” – Niles sleeps with Lilith. As a comedy writer you dream that just once you write a script that comes out this well.

ALMOST PERFECT – “Pilot” – Written by me, David, and Robin Schiff. I still think it’s a helluva pilot.

BIG WAVE DAVE’S – “Pilot” – We have never written any half hour before or since that got a ten-minute laugh spread.

BIG WAVE DAVE’S – “Him” – Aired once and never seen again (although it’s up on YouTube). The lead character experiences what it’s like to go through childbirth by trying to catch a marlin. How often do you see that storyline on a series?

THE SIMPSONS – “Dancin’ Homer” – Our first foray into animation. I also got to do a voice and create a character (the Capitol City Goofball – I still have my original drawing of it somewhere). This is probably the only credit many of my younger readers know.

Okay, there’s 8 fun-filled hours. If you have other favorites I’d love to hear ‘em and why. Thanks. As for producing, I have no favorites. Just thrilled that I was associated with so many great series.

Happy binging.

Jewish New Year Jingle

In honor of the Jewish New Year, here is an actual radio jingle KMPC Los Angeles had made for the occasion.  These are the Anita Kerr Singers.  I'm sure they got a lot of play out of it.

More great unsold pilots

Here are more great unsold pilots. Yesterday I also had a bunch.   From the unsold pilot book by Lee Goldberg.  You can find it here.  Remember, these are all for real.

TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER    ABC-1964 -- Two aliens from Venus come to earth, meet an inventor, and go into business with him selling to unknowing earthlings products created for another planet.

13 THIRTEENTH AVENUE    CBS-1983 – Similar to one of yesterday’s entries, this one features a widower and his son who move into a Greenwich Village apartment building inhabited by a model who’s a witch, a C.P.A. who’s a werewolf, a lawyer who’s a vampire, a superintendent who’s a troll, and their psychiatrist.

WHERE’S EVERETT?    CBS-1966 -- Alan Alda (of all people) as a young father who goes to get the morning paper and finds that aliens have left an invisible baby on his doorstep. (Oooh, if only I knew about this when I worked with him on MASH…)

YAZOO   NBC-1984 -- William Conrad (the Fat Man from Jake &) is a widowed journalist who goes fishing one day, falls asleep in the boat, and wakes up in a magical world called Yazoo, populated by the Peppercorn Puppets. (I can't believe this one didn't go.) 

AFTER GEORGE   CBS-1983 – Susan Saint James as a widow who discovers her late husband programmed his personality into the computer that operates their house. (MY HUSBAND THE HARD DRIVE)

JUSTIN CASE   ABC-1988 – One of the 12,000 ghost pilots but this one featured the great George Carlin as a ghost private eye.

WHO GOES THERE?   CBS-1965 – Two troublesome ghosts haunting a southern California tract house materialize as General Custer and Indian Chief Running Dog.  (Tract house or crack house?)

IT'S A DOG'S LIFE  NBC-1979 – From the people who brought you ALL IN THE FAMILY comes this tale (tail?) of actors dressed as dogs. (Long before WILFRED)

K-9000   Fox-1989 – A loose cannon on the LAPD has a microchip implanted in his brain by a hot woman scientist allowing him to talk telepathically with his new partner, a genetically-enhanced German shepherd.

POOCHINSKI   NBC-1990 – Dog pilots were also big.  Stanley Poochinski is a tough, ill-mannered cop who has been gunned down in the line of duty and reincarnated as a talking, flatulent English bulldog.

THE ELIZABETH McQUEENY STORY  NBC-1959 – Bette Davis as the leader of an all-female dance troupe that travels through the Old West.

MURDER IN MUSIC CITY  NBC-1979 – I saved the best for last.  Sonny Bono as a Nashville songwriter who becomes a detective. (When he caught the bad guy did he say, “I got you, babe!”?)